Scott Schimmel 0:20
Hey, welcome back to another episode of the YouSchool podcast. We took a little time off for, for fun, for vacation, and Fourth of July, all that business, but we're back and talking to you this summer about critical life skills that our kids need. Skills that they will not get from school. They might not even get these skills until it's way too late. I was having a conversation with a recent high school graduate, we were talking about the student's career plans, and they said that that was just way up in the air, no clue. And yet what they were passionate about, wouldn't make any sense, because it wouldn't earn enough money. Now, here's, here's the conversation we're gonna have today. We want to teach kids how to earn a living, how to make money. I was talking with another student at the Fourth of July parade in our neighborhood. And she said that the she'd already got to graduate, sorry, she already graduated college, and a grad program was essentially recruiting her to come and all of her professors were saying you got to do this, you got to do this. But she wisely discerned that hardly any of the graduates from that master's program were employed within a year after graduating, so she decided not to do it. Because she saw that another $40,000-$50,000 of school debt would not yield her earning a living. In fact, she can start earning and living now skip that money, and probably be way further ahead, potentially for the rest of her life. So super smart. We want our kids, I want my kids to understand how to make a living because part of the goal of parenting is to help our kids become ultimately self sufficient. It's of all the metrics measurements of are you an effective parent or not, this is a big one. This is like one of the final tests. Can they handle and manage life on their own? Specifically, can they pay their bills. There's always going to be caveats, asterisk, asteriskes, how do you say that? Especially if you're live in California or the coasts? I mean, is it really possible to earn a living? But this is one of the markers. Did you prepare your kid to handle their life on their own? Or are they always coming home or they're always needing money? That's one of the markers. But on the flip side, on the flip side, and this is so much part of the YouSchool conversation is are they also, as they grow up, on the path towards happiness, meaning and fulfillment? And what we're gonna talk about here is- are these two things mutually exclusive? Let me go back to my story. Third grade, I'm getting to the car after school, my mom picks me up and I say, Gee, Mom, I can't wait till I get older, and I'm going to be an elementary school teacher just like Mr. Bailey. And she very quickly said, I won't forget, Oh, honey, that's not going to work for you. Because look at your dad, and look what he does for work, how hard he works in business. That's what it takes to be able to provide for a family. And teachers don't make enough to do that. Now, this is not a hate of my mom, thank you. She'll probably watch and she'll probably get mad at me. She knows I tell the story. And honestly, I've said the exact same thing to my kids. It reminds me of one of my kids who shall not be named, but he, my only child who is a boy, mentioned a couple of years ago, when I get older, I'm gonna live at the beach. He's a surfer, loves the beach. And we're coming back from the beach that day. He says when I get older, I'm gonna live at the beach. So I very quickly, the same thing that my mom did when I was in third grade, turned to my son and said, Do you know how much these houses cost? Do you know the kind of career that you would need to have, the kind of work that you would have to do in order to afford to live here? So it's, it's the same thing. I'm afraid, my son not having the wisdom, the wherewithal, the awareness, any sort of street smarts to be able to be self sufficient. But I also deeply care about my kids being fulfilled. Finding a meaningful life, discovering happiness. So here's the three things three steps three principles to help your kid develop a skill of earning a living, where what we're trying to match is passion and interests, pursuit of something that matters, all that sort of like softer stuff in their career pursuits with you got to earn a living, you got to make money. So three things to think about. Number one- and this is just as much my advice, all these episodes are advice for me too. Number one- affirm. They've got something that they're interested in, you be on the lookout for it. Pointed it out to them. It seems like you're interested in... It seems like you really find life in... It seems like you really care about this. Or as they're sharing something with you, and they say things like, when I get older, I want to be a teacher, I want to be an artist I want to be I want to live at the beach and surf all day, that our first move is to be positive about that affirming. We want, I want our kids, my kids, to have big dreams about their future. They do not need that to be squashed right now today, in this moment by me. What happens though, I think internally if I'm totally honest, is I feel anxious. And I panic. And I want to, I want to pass along that fear that I have that I'm going to blow it as a parent onto them and say, Oh, you better buckle up Buster! Costs a lot of money, there's taxes, and there's health insurance, and you might lose your job and, and I want to turn that voice on that's inside means inside of you, it's inside of everybody. And bring this kind of should, ought, shame, fear, you better be responsible at all costs. That's the point of life. But not this part, we want to affirm them. We want to celebrate, that's awesome. That'd be so cool. That'd be so cool. To be able to surf one morning and ski in the afternoon. That would be awesome. It'd be so cool to be able to be done with work by 11 in the morning, that'd be awesome. It'd be so cool. To be a YouTube star. That'd be awesome. So affirm. Then, as that moment has passed, not five minutes later, 15 minutes later, but like two days later. The second part is to expose them. And what I mean by this is expose them to the realities of life, expose them to the realities of how much things cost, expose them to the realities of how much people earn. How else are they going to learn this stuff? How else do you know? I didn't know that teachers only make a certain amount of money. And to live in Orange County where I grew up in South Orange County in a gated neighborhood, like I grew up, that a teacher one salary with a spouse at home, that was probably not going to be able to work on paper, in the math. So we expose them. We expose them to the realities of our own bills, our own path, the path that we've taken in our career, we expose them to friends, family members, meaning we point out this- Do you know how much that that house costs? Do you know how much it costs to live in this neighborhood? Do you know how much rent goes for? Do you know what kind of salary that kind of person makes an engineer at that company? Google it, look it up, let's go explore that. We want to be the ones who guide them to be exposed to the realities of life. We want to expose them that there are several ways to make money. We want to expose them to the realities that many people today have multiple streams of income, they have many side hustles, the old traditional kind of you started working at IBM and you finish working at IBM 45 years later and get a pension and you retire and you play golf. That is one story. But probably not going to be their story, not their reality. So we expose them. The third part would be to inquire. To inquire with them what it looks like to plug in things that they're interested in, passionate about, curious about. And help them learn. Help them make the decisions. Help them see the path that would help them get there. Help them inquire about the realities of life. Ask them questions- What do you think? What do you want? What matters to you? So we guide them. We affirm them, we expose them, and then we inquire and help them reflect so they can become wiser. Critical life skill- understand how to earn a living, how to make money, how to pay for your life, how to manage things. This, again is not going to be taught in school. They're not going to get this from YouTube. There's probably some YouTube channels, they can learn this from you. So what does it look like for you this summer, to affirm their dreams, their values, things that they're interested in their passions, their pursuits, to expose them to the realities of who are the people in their life that are doing different kinds of careers and the struggles that they have and the benefits that they get? And then always be asking them questions about what they're interested in, what matters most to them, what their plans are, how they think they can get there. And overall, that turns into wisdom. These critical foundations critical life skills that every single kid needs. How to earn a living is one of them. Maybe you're still figuring it out, share it with them. So we'll be back next week with another episode of the YouSchool podcast.
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Transcribed by https://otter.ai