Scott Schimmel 0:21
Well, hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of The New School podcast. And it is a new year, new me. I'm actually part of the new me is I'm wearing glasses now, because I can't see anything anymore. But if you're watching this on YouTube, which by the way, if you're listening to this, we do have these episodes on YouTube, which I know some teachers and coaches have been using these episodes to watch like in a homeroom. And this episodes, especially one because we took a couple of weeks off at the end of 2022. Now it's 2023. And I honestly feel like a renewed focus for what we're doing and how to support adults, parents and educators and coaches for how to support kids in designing lives that matter. So more resources come in this year, new offers new, new, new ways for you to grow and get the tools that you need to support the kids that you care about, which is what we are all about with you school. Okay, so your new you what we're talking about, in many ways is this idea of New Year's resolutions, which I think I've tried to do every single year with my kids. And now I have three, two of them teenagers 16, 14 and nine and a half, and try to have these conversations with him around the turn of the year of what are you hoping for? What do you what do you want to do next year, what are and typically the conversations go like this, I don't know. Nothing, or really superficial things like I want to go skiing more, I want to surf more, I want to hang out with my friends more stuff that yes, of course it matters to them, but doesn't necessarily. It's not the kind of the depth of conversation that I want to have with them. So maybe you can relate and maybe you're coming back with your class, if you're a teacher, your team, if you're a coach or with your kids, if you're parent, or grandparent or guardian and you want to have conversations with them about kind of like wake up, this is your life, this is your story, make it count, go after things like that's the kind of feeling that you have, and you want to express that. But you've tried and it doesn't quite work out that way. So this is a really quick episode on how to evoke motivation inside of kids. So that they feel like they have clarity, they have tone on what they want. And they're going after it. And we're going to talk about that through the science of hope. Now I get it, some kids just kind of pop out of the womb, come to class, come to your family, come to the team, and they're just the internally driven kids. And I don't know what it is. It's genetics, it's personality. It's a coping mechanism. I don't know what it is. But most kids don't. Most kids are just frankly, going through the motions and some version of going through the motions, whether that means they struggle to find any motivation. They're they're kind of detached, disengaged, frozen. Or this is more kind of what it was like for me to be a teenager. What many students are just kind of like, getting through it, they're doing what's expected of them. They're showing up, they're raising their hand when they need to, they're getting the grades that don't doesn't make anybody worry or wonder how they're doing. And they just get through it. That's, I think most kids. But what we want to actually unpack and uncover and look at is this lens of motivation. Because I think a lot of times, kids as we talk to them as I talk to them as I see in my own story. A lot of kids feel like life is just happening to them. Or maybe another way to think about it is that they're a character in someone else's story. It's my parents, it's my coach. It's my teachers, it's my peers. I'm just reacting I'm just responding. I'm just playing a part I'm showing up. Is this block day? Is this even periods? Am I supposed to dress out in PE today or not? What time is practice? What time's the game? Where's the tournament? What do I need to pack? You know, it's just that sort of vibe. It's that sort of just kind of I'm just going through it. And sometimes a lot of kids feel like even if they do try their futures already predicted. They look at older kids, and realize it doesn't matter. If I try harder. The coach only plays his favorites. It doesn't matter if I get better grades. I know four kids who last year didn't get into [Name the school]. It doesn't matter how good of scores, I get in ACT or SAT. I know about the kids who didn't get a scholarship, because they didn't have some sort of advantage that I don't have. So, you know, that's nothing can be more demotivating to feel like I cannot change my situation, it doesn't matter what I do. And even if I were to give more effort, it also wouldn't change the arc of my story, the trajectory of where my life is going. That is a bummer. A major bummer. And what we're actually talking about is hopelessness. And I don't mean hopelessness in that sort of pollyannish. It's not the emotion of hopelessness. It's more the state of hopelessness. It's not like, Oh, are you having you bummed out, not that kind of hopelessness. But this kind of miserable experience of being hopeless, where you feel like, no matter what I do, it's not going to change anything, I cannot see a different future, I cannot see a different reality than the reality that I'm living. The good news though, and I've done a lot of learning on this in 2022 last year. The good news is that hope can be developed, can be cultivated, you can actually teach hope. And as I've learned, from friends of mine, the University of Oklahoma, shout out to Dr. Debbie Trevino-Muhlenberg. The good news is that even within an hour, or less of teaching kids hope strategies, the signs of hope, we can measure they've measured, that hope can increase, and it can change a kid's outlook, which can evoke motivation inside them, we can actually do this is coming from Snyder's hope theory. If you want to read a book about it, there's a couple of good books, I'll mention them in the show notes, maybe even at the end, there's over I think, 200 or 2000, I forget the scale, let's say 200, to be fair, 200 research studies, studying the intervention of the science of hope, to show how impactful it is it it's, I believe one of the most significant strategic levers that adults have for kids or anybody that you're working with, it is absolutely powerful. Later this month, we're going to go into a deeper dive webinar online workshop that you can attend whether you're a member, educated, educator member with us or parent member with us. Anybody can do it. But it's coming later this month, details forthcoming time and place, etc. But hope can be developed. And we're gonna get into it really fast. For the next two minutes, there's two parts really three, but two parts for us in this conversation about the science of hope. The first part is pathways, the pathways whole pathways are about your ability to see the path to getting what you want, it's the ability to see that there are different paths, different scenarios, different contingencies, you can see that there might even be someone that can help you see, or see, and understand that there are tools to help you discover how to get to where you're going. When you don't feel like there's a way to get there, I'm never going to get in, I'm never going to play, I'm never going to make the team, I'm never gonna get anyone to really notice me, you give up, I can't see how that would be possible. That's the first part. The second part is this more idea of like agency. It's, it's about seeing yourself as a part of the story. If I do something, I can affect the outcome. So it's, it's seeing yourself in that. So pathways are about I can see agencies about I can do it. And both of those can actually with with really short reflection exercises be changed. Someone can actually process through those and see more clearly, and feel more confident that they have what it takes. So how do you do this? Well, to help a student cultivate hope, it's important that we guide them to do a couple things, not only describe the type of future they want, as well as the different possible routes to get there. So it's it's a thinking reflection exercise that is started in individually. But then done best and community done best out loud together. So let's help each other to describe what the possible future could be. And then the different paths to get there. Oftentimes, if you're a kid, your, your exposure, your perspective is limited. So you don't I don't know how to get better at that sport. And you're talking to someone else who says, Oh, well, let me tell you. Let me show you a video. Let me introduce you to someone. Let me expose you to a different way of thinking about it. Peer tutoring, peer counseling is in really just conversations structured guided conversations with peers, can be incredibly powerful to increase hope. So it looks like this asking them to name specific things that they can do they can engage in to make progress and helping them break it down to as small steps as possible first,
If, so, if you want that, and describe why you want that, and how we would feel to get that, that's how that's seen, then what would you do specifically? And what would you have to do to do that? And when would you do it? It's those kinds of very simple questions. What do you want? And why? What are some possible paths to get what you want? What are the next two to three things that you can do and will do to move forward? This is how we evoke hope, and motivation. Students, here's the final quote, students with higher levels of hope are more resilient, make better choices are self motivated, more effective problem solvers do better academically and are less likely to engage in risky behaviors like substance abuse. And it's possible, and it's simple, and you can do it. It starts with us, processing our own hope about what we want, reflecting on the pathways we might take, and what we will do and can do to move forward on those pathways. And then sharing that with kids. It looks like us carving out the time and space to intentionally lead them in those discussions, whether you're a math teacher, history, lacrosse coach, Mom, Uncle, big brother, youth, Pastor, whatever you're doing, say I'm going to do this time and carve out time, I'm going to ask kids to process, ask them to share why. And then walk them through the process of doing this. Again, we'll have a webinar later this month that goes deeper in but don't just say, hey, New Year's resolutions, and they say I don't know, or something really fluffy. Let's actually help kids imagine a future and how they can be the agents and authors of a better future. We'll be back next week with another episode of the uscho podcast. Hey, thanks for joining in on the YouSchool podcast, we'd love to share with you the resources available on our website at theyouschool.com not just articles, ebooks, worksheets and other podcast episodes. But specifically you should know about a free course we have available called the Real Me course. It's digital, it's interactive, and it'll guide you to get clear about who you are in the great story you can tell with your life. So go register for a free account and get started on the Real Me course today at theyouschool.com That's the you school dot com.