Scott Schimmel (00:07.726)
Can you think of a time when you like wore the wrong thing? I remember this time in, I think it was seventh grade or eighth grade, middle school, and my older sister convinced me that what all the cool kids, cool kids were wearing were this outfits with like, kind of like Zee Cavaricchi, if you're old enough to remember that. So I bought and wore one day, once to school, off -white cream colored jeans and a rust colored button down.
Long sleeve shirt. Didn't go well. Did not go well. Never tried that again. Never trusted my sister's advice on fashion again. Have you ever like said the wrong thing? I have almost every meeting I've ever been in, but I remember in sixth grade I ran for student council, VP of finance or something. And I decided last minute to make my school wide speech like a sarcastic critique of the entire system.
Not only did I not win, I did not get even second place runner up. I was third out of three. Have you ever felt like you're not enough, not smart enough? My older sister's 4 .72 GPA. You ever felt like you weren't social enough? I just grew up extremely shy, reserved, socially anxious. It wasn't until end of college that I broke out of that shell. There's so many times.
when I haven't felt like enough. But when it comes to career choices, where you're gonna go, whether it's college choices or career choices, one of the primary temptations that every young person faces and the message I think they receive, loud and clear, is to prove yourself, make something of yourself, do something that would be impressive, do something that would be valuable and worthwhile. And every single culture, every single family has their own version of what that means.
But what's the opposite? What is the opposite of trying to prove yourself, trying to make yourself because it's a really dangerous pursuit. In fact, the research shows overwhelmingly that the pursuit of goals or aspirations for the sake of impressing others, getting status, feeling like you're more in control or in charge, success, financial success, whatever it is.
Scott Schimmel (02:34.174)
pursuits with those motivations will not work out for you. You will neither experience the deep satisfaction that you really hope for in life. You won't be happy, nor will you achieve as much as if you were pursuing those things because it was authentic to who you are, which is the alternative path to not do something to quote unquote make yourself or prove yourself, but to do something that's authentic to yourself. How do you do that? It starts with asking the question.
It starts with asking the question. That's the beginning of self -awareness. So if you are a young person listening to this, let me ask you some questions. What are the options that you're considering? We'll make a list. The options of paths that you're going to take, careers you're going to take, colleges that you're going to apply to. And for each one of those, let's say a scale of one to seven or one to 10, you choose. To what degree, if you did that, would you feel like the other people in your life would be proud of you?
would think that you're doing something important and then make your own list. Make your own list of the things that you would be doing because you enjoy them, because you're wired for them, because they genuinely irritate you or you're curious about them. That's the beginning of self -awareness. It starts with self -reflection. And if you're someone caring about a younger person, what does it look like for you to come alongside them and not only be the cheerleader,
when they choose something or say something or consider something that would be impressive to you or relieve some of your anxiety, like for their future welfare. What does it look like for you to equally celebrate or support the choices that they're making, the options that they're considering in such a way that they feel really supported by you? So it's a temptation to try to prove yourself, to try to make something of yourself. It hasn't worked for the generations before. It...
Probably won't work for you either So are you willing to take the courageous step to go down the less traveled path the path? We're not trying to prove yourself and make something of yourself But you're trying to be yourself and express who you truly are in this world trusting That the finances will take care of themselves that people will be impressed because they look at you and see you truly satisfied Truly make it an impact in the world. That's The better life that's the meaningful