The Cost of Self-Awareness

One of the first times I remember becoming more self-aware was when a good friend of mine criticized me to my face. I was being sarcastic in an attempt to be funny (I know, you must be shocked! (See what I just did there?)). He turned to me and snapped, “Why do you always have to be so critical all the time?!?” In my shock, I quickly made a joke, deflected his comment, and changed the subject. But what he said stuck with me, even to this day. I had no idea I came across that way. 

Self-awareness can sometimes be like a slap in the face. It can feel abrasive and harsh, especially when caught off guard. 

But sometimes, the stakes of the lack of self-awareness are even higher than getting your feelings hurt. 

More Than Your Personality Traits

People who lack self-awareness are typically difficult to be in a relationship with. They don’t understand how they come across, lack sensitivity and empathy, and often act in a selfish way. That’s a major life problem that must be addressed—having a happy, meaningful life without close, quality relationships is impossible. 

More Than Self-Care

People who lack self-awareness typically do a poor job managing their own affairs. They’re the ones who ignore the cues for what their body and soul need in order to rest, rejuvenate, and re-energize. 

The Opportunity Cost to Life

I applied and attended a university on a false premise. Because I didn’t know myself well yet, I picked a career path that took me to an expensive private school. Honestly, I don’t regret the decision that much- in college, I met my wife and best friends and ultimately discovered my true identity. But if I’m honest, my lack of self-awareness cost a TON of money and wasted years of my life investing in an irrelevant education. 

People who lack self-awareness are more likely to waste time doing what they think they’re supposed to do according to someone else’s agenda for them. In more esoteric terms, they play a character in someone else’s story than their own. Eventually, though, it catches up with them. No one can play pretend forever. 

Fortunately for me, I was able to grow pretty rapidly in self-awareness before I made even more costly mistakes with a career, a spouse, or my character. 

That’s what drives me to do this work with kids. I believe every kid deserves the opportunity to grow in self-awareness and clarity about themselves and life when they’re young. It’s possible, too.

All for the sake of kids,

Scott Schimmel
President & Chief Guide | The YouSchool
949.291.9061 |

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